Are you finding yourself in a mindset funk?
I’ve noticed a theme in many of my recent supervision conversations. With my supervisees I have been discussing mindset, choices, shifting attitudes, and being open to possibilities.
There is an interesting premise in these discussions that I want to explore more. When I reflect on my own life, many of the stressors I face are exacerbated by how I view them.
To give an example, if my friend is constantly late for an agreed catch up, I can interpret this as he is no longer invested in our friendship. I might begin to think of all the times he has “let me down”. I notice a shift in my mood from expectant to disappointed or hurt. I’ll ruminate on how this friend is rejecting me. … you get the idea. How I feel about my friend being late is influenced by the lens I choose to view it through.
I notice similar perspectives in my work. Often when supervisees are facing a big change in their work lives, such as a change in manager, service, or the risk of losing their job they can leap to a worst-case scenario quite quickly. It could be human nature, to expect the worst, but what I want to explore is what if we expect the best?
How do we shift our mindset?
The study of positive psychology helps us understand the power behind a shift in mindset. My blog A Growth Mindset described Dr Carol Dweck’s research into how our belief about our own potential to overcome obstacles influences how we approach difficult situations. If we can view challenges, not as evidence of our inabilities, but as a way to get smarter, we can bounce back from obstacles much easier. Dweck’s research indicates that we can shift our mindset from fixed to growth with real benefits to our own happiness, wellbeing, and productivity.
For me, the line “I choose to believe it is possible that ….” creates a space for me to be open to a different way of thinking, or a different outcome. It allows me to be open to options I hadn’t previously considered. For instance “I choose to believe it is possible that my friend’s lateness is a symptom of a busy life, not a reflection of how much he values me.” It doesn’t change my friend’s lateness, just my feelings, and mindset around this.
A recent supervisee decided she chose to believe that it was possible that a change in manager may be a really great chance to create a new positive culture shift in her workplace. Using that lens of view allowed her to shift from a place of anxiety, to look for opportunities.
Living in Possibility
Living in possibility helps me avoid going down a rabbit hole of blame, right or wrong, or the worst-case scenario. Effectively I am making a choice – and that action shifts my attitude to one open to possibilities.
If you would like some help to explore the idea of shifting your mindset to enhance your wellbeing contact me here…
For another example of how asking a different question helped me and my family create an amazing opportunity take a look at this earlier blog From Why Not?… to What if?
